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A Christmas pantomime written in rhyme.
From the original story by the Brothers Grimm.
Humorous Pantomime.
Adults and children.
2 for moving props etc.
30-40 minutes or less if you cut out a song or two.
Good evening everyone,
Are you ready to have some fun?
Our pantomime is White Snow,
Pauses, looks puzzled...
I don't think that's how it should go,
Perhaps it's actually Snow White,
Yes, that sounds about right,
And some little guys too,
Tries to remember the word Dwarf
Imps, Goblins I've no clue,
Anyhow folks let's get on with the show,
Or your impatience will surely grow.
The Queen stands opposite the mirror holding it while the person playing the mirror holds it from behind the mirror. The Queen is admiring herself.
Mirror, Mirror in my hand,
Who is the fairest in the land?
With a dignified, solemn voice
Well it was you,
But now that's just not true,
For there's another near,
And her beauty is clear,
You could have some work done,
A nip and a tuck to make you young.
Shouting now!
Shut up you wretched thing!!
This girl someone must bring,
I want her gone from this place,
So all you can look upon is my beautiful face.
So the queen was in a rage,
She thought she looked good, (for her age).
Turns and whispers 'for her age' to the audience
A huntsman she did call,
And in he came looking meek and small.
Huntsman enters the queen's room and gets down on bended knee, bowing to the Queen and looking scared.
Y-Y-Yes your divine one?
What is it that you want done?
What do you know of this beautiful girl?
The one who puts me in a whirl.
It's a tale but nothing more,
What of it? What do you ask for?
The queen's now snapping at the huntsman
It is I who's doing the asking here,
Now come closer come near,
Huntsman stands now and moves closer to the queen
I want you to do a task,
Now this is what I ask.
Anything for you my queen,
You want to know if she's been seen?
Just listen you impatient man,
And I'll tell you my plan,
You'll need to be fearless and brave,
And also have a damn shave!
Of course, of course I look a sight,
I will go immediately and make it right.
Rips off false beard and starts walking away!
STOP! You stupid little fool,
Keep calm and keep your cool,
I want this girl to be gone,
So on me, the spotlight will be shone.
Queen smoothes her hair loving herself as she talks.
You want me to shoo her away?
Well I sure as hell don't want her to stay.
Change bedroom scene for the tent and woodland setting. Huntsman is shaking with fear at night time with the forest's sounds. (SEE WOODLAND SOUNDS)
So it was, that the huntsman went,
And for days lived in a tent.
The huntsman couldn't find Snow White anywhere,
She had no cave, no home or lair,
Meanwhile at the same time in the wood,
Snow White was feeling happy and good.
Humming or whistling in between her lines, any happy tune here
Such a beautiful day today,
I feel like it's my birthday,
The birds are singing in the trees,
Play birdsong here (SEE SONGS LINK). She's walking along looking up at the trees, smiling.
Oh their song does please.
Huntsman sees Snow White
That must be her. Wow! She's stunning,
No wonder the queen wants her off running.
What was that noise?
Looks to the audience
Do you know ladies and gentlemen,
Girls and boys?
Snow White in her innocence had no clue,
What the huntsman was about to do.
Fear not my beautiful child,
Things are about to get a little wild,
Here in my pocket I have a knife,
Pulls a spoon from his pocket but doesn't notice it yet
You better run now, run for your life,
Now notices the spoon
Oh my god that's a stupid spoon,
I'm an idiot, a right loon.
What? Who are you? Why would you hurt me?
The queen fears you... don't you see?
Fears me, foolish woman, why oh why?
Because her mirror does not lie,
It told her about your beauty and your grace,
And now she's worried about her wrinkled face.
Then I must run oh my, oh heck,
Where will I go? Where will I trek?
Not my problem my dear,
Now go, get outta here,
I don't want to harm,
Cos you seem full of charm.
Snow White ran as fast as she could,
Through the darkening scary wood,
A friendly rabbit hopped on by,
But then turned and asked,
Why are you here, why?
I'm being chased I have to go,
Can you help me? Can you show
Me a safe place to hide and stay,
I've got to get out of the way.
I know a place where you can hide,
You're slim, that's good cos the doors aren't wide,
Come on and follow me,
I'll take you to safety, you'll see.
So follow the rabbit Snow White did,
She knew she had to be safe and hid,
Through the wood they did go,
As Snow White's fears began to grow,
But then up ahead on the path,
She sees a man and hears him laugh.
Prince talking to himself
It's so hot. I must find something to drink,
To have a cool head to think,
I should be back by noon
My journey should start soon
Rabbit, Rabbit slow down a mo,
Let's enjoy the show,
Who is that man ? that guy?
He's so handsome it makes me shy.
Sounding panicked here!
What, are you crazy?
Has your mind gone hazy?
Umm... mad guy chasing you, you said,
I wonder if I have been mislead?
Have you gone completely blind?
Or out of your tiny furry mind?
He is handsome by all means
He must come from good genes!
Snow White sings 'Dizzy' and the audience sings along with her.
The prince now looks up and spots Snow White. He smiles and walks towards her.
Oh my gosh what do I do now?
He's coming my way ummm... wow!
Hello Miss are you okay?
You're very pretty I must say.
Snow White smiles up at him looking flattered and flustered.
Rabbit coughs to interrupt them
Oh cut it out you two,
Miss we've got stuff to do.
Oh Rabbit you're so right,
I've got to get out of sight.
They leave in a hurry leaving the prince to chase after them.
At least tell me your name pretty Miss,
So I'll know one day who I'm about to kiss.
Kiss, Rabbit did he say kiss?
Oh my, what bliss,
My name Sir is Snow White,
And you are a handsome sight.
The prince sits and daydreams and sings 'Do Wah Diddy Diddy' and the audience sings with him.
Snow White and the rabbit arrive at the dwarves' cottage. Display a small doorway and sleeping bags strewn everywhere.
Here we are,
We've traveled far,
Now inside you go.
But won't the owners know?
They won't mind my dear.
If you're sure there's nothing to fear.
Show Snow White enters the cottage and looks at the mess...
So into the cottage Snow White did go,
Her heartbeat in pace did grow,
What to do she didn't know
She saw inside four tiny beds,
And four pillows to rest tiny heads.
How strange and one's smaller than the others,
And so untidy, where are their mothers?
Oh the poor dears are all alone,
I bet they've never had kindness shown.
Snow White starts sweeping.
And so, Snow White started to sweep and clean,
Making it all shine with a sheen.
Snow White starts cleaning and whistling and then she sings 'Love is All Around'. The audience sings along with her.
As the song finishes, the dwarfs enter one by one with Half-Pint following at the rear.
Hello, hello, who are you?
Don't move an inch whatever you do,
You see these hands of mine,
Holds hands up to show Snow White
Deadly weapons they are, so fine.
I won't hurt you.
Doc! Look around at the view.
You tidied the place?
Yes, now you have a tidy space.
Thank you so much,
It's nice to have a woman's touch,
Can she stay Doc - pretty please,
Oh my gosh another sneeze.
Sneezes loudly
I could do with a place to stay,
So Doc, what do you say?
Ummm, well I don't know,
But I don't want to ask you to go,
Half-Pint goes to Snow White and hugs her leg not letting go
Half-Pint, really, you're a twit,
Okay then I guess that's it.
So, Snow White with the dwarfs did stay,
And for a long time it remained this way,
The dwarfs worked in a mine,
Only ever stopping to dine,
Even Half-Pint did his bit,
And kept the mine well lit.
Every morning they went to work singing...
The dwarfs sing Hei Ho marching one behind the other, singing and whistling as they leave the stage.
Then, one day when Snow White was alone,
An old lady visited; meaning her cover was blown.
The Queen is dressed as an old lady, with a shawl half covering her face.
Hello my dear may I sit down?
Audience shouts: No, don't let her sit down!
I'm tired and making my way to town.
Of course please come in and sit,
Snow White let's her in the house. Audience continues to warn Snow White.
I don't mind one little bit.
To reward you for your kindness my dear,
I have a sweet juicy apple here.
Gives Snow White the apple.
Oh, thank you, how very kind,
I'll eat it now if you don't mind.
Audience shouts: Don't eat it!
So Snow White took a bite,
And her world spun and out went her light,
Snow White pretends to die dramatically here. Make sure the apple's not too far away from her!
The old lady was really the queen,
The queen shrugs off the shawl now and laughs at the audience and disappears.
The dwarfs return home to find the door open and Snow White lying down inside.
Oh my gosh Snow White.
Dear girl...
She's gone Doc how do we make it right?
Sneezy:
We can't bring her back.
Look! an apple, she had a snack.
Sleepy picks the apple up and throws it away in the bin.
We'll put her in a coffin made of glass.
They laid Snow White to rest,
They tried their hardest, did their best,
While they sat near her coffin quiet,
They heard a noise, a riot.
Play storm sounds here (SEE SONGS LINK)
So, it worked my poisoned apple,
The Queen enters, laughing hysterically
You should've put her in the chapel.
You did this you evil queen,
How could you be so mean?
Oh I'm not done yet,
You're next, now don't you fret,
I'll make it quick with no pain,
Then you'll see your Snow White again.
As she goes to grab Doc a lightning bolt strikes her and she dies. Turn the light off and point a flashlight/torch toward the queen to imitate lightning.
And so, ladies and gentlemen and boys and girls
The queen is no more,
Just a pile of ashes upon the floor.
Quick someone sweep her away,
So we can get on with our day.
Sleepy sweeps the floor. He falls asleep when he's finished.
The Prince enters and find Snow White 'dead'
Oh no! Is it true?
Snow White what happened to you?
Those red lips I want to kiss,
I'm heartbroken by this.
The prince kisses Snow White and she wakes up. He sings "Can't Help Falling In Love" . The audience sings along with him
She's awake. It must be true love's kiss.
Slowly waking up...
Hey, what did I miss?
Now, Snow White is awake,
Come on let's bake a sponge cake!
Or should we open some Bubbles
For the lovely couple?
The Rabbit enters the stage with a cake
They all went back to eat the cake,
What a happy ending this does make.
And now Christmas is the season
For dreams to come true
The season for wishing
All good things to You!
Let's sing together: 'The Twelve Days of Christmas'
Looking forward to hearing from you
Maybe you can give us a progress report